Rob Zombie’s House of 1000 Corpses

There are two things I learned while watching Rob Zombie's House of 1000 Corpses: 1. If you wanna see a boob shot of Marilyn Monroe, watch this movie (and don't tell me it's a fake photo!! No one would EVER Photoshop Marilyn!) and 2. Don't ever trust some guy in clown paint.

Rob Zombie, founder and front man for the metal band White Zombie, made his directorial debut with the horror movie House of 1000 Corpses. It's the story of four kids, Jerry and Denise, and couple Bill and Mary, who, while on their way to visit Denise's father, happen upon "Captain Spaulding’s Museum of Monsters & Madmen" -a combination gas station and Carnival type Side Show that showcases the history of former serial killers.

Jerry could not be more excited as ironically, he is writing a book on roadside attractions. He falls into hog heaven when he learns that Captain Spaulding (played by the talented Sid Haig) has the inside scoop on Dr. Satan, a mad scientist who was obsessed with creating a new breed of humans - super humans if you will - through bizarre and grotesque surgeries performed on human subjects. Live human subjects (needless to say he failed.)

Jerry begs his friends to visit the nearby legendary Deadwood Tree, the execution site of Dr. Satan, and although Denise wants to skip visiting the tree and head straight to her father's house as planned, she is out voted, so together the foursome set out to visit Deadwood Tree.

(Probably not the smartest decision they made on their trip, but unfortunately, not the stupidest either.The stupidest decision they make is while on their way to Deadwood Tree: they pickup a hitchhiker named Baby Firefly.)

Soon the tire of their car is shot out by an unidentified man, but luckily it's not far from Baby's house. Baby (played by none other than Rob Zombie's real life bride Sheri Moon) invites them over until their car can be repaired. (Typical for B movies, the spare tire concept was apparently lost on the foursome and not factored into their travel plans. Dumb kids.)

That's when the fun really begins.

It seems the Firefly's are a family of torturous and demented freaks who like to unmercifully violate their victims. We learn they already have in their possession five missing cheerleaders, whom they have taken great pleasure in beating and abusing. We also learn that the Firefly's enjoy an occasional meal of human flesh. Too bad our foursome isn't informed of this tidbit of information before dinner.

What happens next is a sick carnival ride of blood, gore, and shock effects that only Rob Zombie could deliver (and if you watched his vision version of Halloween, you'd understand.)

I do not believe that Rob Zombie was going for a cohesive story line with this movie. Instead, I think he was aiming towards glorifying the horror classics that influenced his pension for such things, such as The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Evil Dead, and Last House on the Left and ff you are paying enough attention to the details of this movie, you will catch images and references to those very films. A homage of sorts.

Zombie's vision glorifies the exploitation genre, providing enough bloodshed, gore, and slasher type shock effect to satisfy just about every caliber of horror fan. That is as long as you have an open enough mind for the suspension of belief, and are not a stickler for details. But isn't that the case with most horror movies? Isn't that why we enjoy them so much? The "unbelievable" factor? At least it is the reason for me....

Although the majority of the "crimes" committed in this film have been witnessed on film before, Rob Zombie's slant is refreshing and creative, and I can only imagine what the unedited and unrated directors cut (if ever released on video) will offer. I'm guessing a whole lot more blood and guts than even I could handle, with plot and substance of course, remaining optional.

The movie wraps up with a climatic chain reaction of Denise's dad calling in the cops to go looking for her, and all of them ending up dead in a graphic manner at the Firefly's hovel. Although this is not typically the type of horror movie I add to my drawer of keepers (as his version of Halloween has) I must say that while I did not thoroughly enjoy the movie, I enjoyed it enough to say that I think it's worth watching.

....don't you?

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